An uncle whom I knew since childhood recently lost his job. He was about to complete 25 years in the organization but due to the cost-cutting methodology of the company, 15 people were shown the door, uncle being one of them. His daughter and I are childhood friends. I don't even remember since when I know her. That's how long the friendship is. My dad called me to inform regarding this tragic news of him sitting at home at the stage when two of his daughters are almost ready for marriage while a son is still in 7th std. The eldest daughter, my friend, has completed her LAW and is practicing these days. My parents were very sad about the happening and almost all the time went in discussing how will they survive. I just couldn't tolerate the whole thing so I questioned.
I asked my father that when my friend has started earning, will not the whole family survive and eat by that income? Talking about the two children who are still studying, they can continue their education from the money uncle would be getting from the company- which would be in lakhs. And suppose even that turns out to be less, education loan is always there. But my parents say that they can not take money of their daughter as our so-called sanskaar says that a girl's money shouldn't be considered as our own. I laughed. I said that if this is the condition, then ask why didn't he save appropriately or why did he produce his 3rd child at the time when he must have calculated that his son will earn only after his retirement. And any unfortunate event related to job happening before his retirement would lead to a great financial crisis.
My father still kept saying that whatever you say is right but still girl's money couldn't be used at home considering she is going to be some other family's part. How sick is that! And then the argument began. What is the use of culture if its saddening almost everyone attached to it. A culture should be something that brings peace and system in society. But the day you realize the same culture has become a reason of destruction, worries and sorrow, you should remove it or change it. A culture should be made adaptive with times because the world has progressed enough. You cannot always follow something that was created 1000 years back. It's cool that our forefathers followed almost everything that was taught to them by their fathers but it's our time and if we find that we are getting into trouble because of those rules and cultures, it's time to change them.
If girl's money is the only source of living that it has to be utilized otherwise the family is dying. Otherwise why did you invest so much in your daughter's education? Now when she is standing shoulder to shoulder with boys, you are not letting her help her parents till their last breathe like a son does. Isn't this violation of a person in name of culture? Our parents always keep reminding us of culture whenever we start doing something that is out of box or too liberalized. I don't understand how culture can take away someone's freedom to perform activity of his/her own interest. Indian culture is shameful these days. Dowry, killing girls before birth, giving whole property to boy, spending hefty amounts in wedding, blaming girls for rape, hiding girls in black burkha etc is what Indian Culture is. It has to be changed otherwise tears and painful death are the only gifts you will achieve in the end. That's all.
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